A Week of SPACE

I had the most beautiful week at SPACE on Ryder Farm last week working on a new play and getting fed 3 glorious square meals a day by a really talented chef.

I also got to pet a horse and went swimming and stand-up paddle boarding in a lake.

I read a lot and wrote a lot and slept a lot and met some very cool artists. Basically, it was perfect.

We Don’t Have Those Anymore

Blender. Food processor. Television. Radio. Cell phone. Landline. Wifi. Sattelite Dish. CD Player. DVD Player. VCR. Blu Ray Player. Playstation. Xbox. Wii. Laptop. Desktop. Standing lamp. Desk Lamp. Book light. Streetlight. Electric mixer. Electric bread knife. KitchenAid. Toaster. Toaster Oven. Refrigerator. Freezer. Ice Cream Machine. Ice Machine. Dishwasher. Oven. Microwave. Washing Machine. Dryer. Water Heater. Dry Cleaner. Steamer. Car. Space Heater. Motorcycle. El Train. Bus. Tractor. Semi Truck. Humidifier. Dehumidifier. Electric fan. Window Air Conditioner. Sewing Machine. Serger. Iron. Printer. Scanner. Copier. Paper shredder. Projector. Siren. Foghorn. Laser light show. Loudspeaker. Powersaw. Chainsaw. Staple gun. Electric drill. Drill press. Blowtorch. Rechargeable batteries.

Helen and Harold

HELEN: Cookie?

HAROLD: Carbohydrates.

HELEN: Coffee?

HAROLD: Caffeine.

HELEN: Charming you’re such an Epicure.

HAROLD: Life is more than what you can consume, Helen.

HELEN: I’m not so sure.

(Pause)

(Helen takes a box of cookies out of her purse and eat every cookie in the box, one by one. She dips them in her coffee. She makes indecent enjoyment noises. She licks her fingers and her lips, not just at the end of it all, but throughout. She drops a crumb on her lap; she eats that, too. She drinks down all her coffee and runs a finger around the inside of the nearly empty ceramic, picking up the last coffee-soaked crumbs of cookie and licking them off. She smacks her lips.)

HELEN: Scrumptious!

HAROLD: Charming you’re such an Epicure.

HELEN: Isn’t it?

(Harold smiles at Helen. Helen smiles at Harold. She pulls one last biscuit out of her purse. She hands it to him. He sniffs it. He takes it gingerly. He licks it delicately. He takes a tiny piece between his teeth. He sighs. He smiles. He takes another tiny bite.)

Pittsburgh Here I Come!

Thrilled to share that I’ve been accepted into Carnegie Mellon University’s playwriting MFA for fall of 2018. We’ll be moving to Pittsburgh in August and I am thrilled to check out that whole “seasons” thing again. Been a while. What’s a sweater?

I will be joining 5 other awesome playwrights in the class of 2020.’

So if you’re in the area or know someone who is, hit me up!